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The beat up Ford Pinto pulled into the back parking lot of the Silk Stocking with a few creaks and rasps, just as it had done many times before. Behind the wheel, Esperanza sighed, looking out at the run down building for several minutes before finally shaking her head and opening the door. Her long, copper-colored trench-coat fluttered behind her in the light wind as she walked around the building to the front door.
Standing by the door was a large black man with a bald head and a long, braided goatee. His arms were nearly as big around as Esperanza’s waist. He smiled when he saw her walking toward him, revealing a set of gleaming white teeth.
“Esperanza! I thought maybe you finally smartened up and quit this dive.” He said in a deep voice, “It’s good to see you again, Baby-doll.”
“It’s good to see you too, Henry”, Ronnie said with a genuine smile, “No such luck, though. I’ve just been… dealing with a few things.”
The bouncer grinned, “I hear that, girl. Aint a soul in this place aint dealing with something or another. I really hoped you’d finally gotten outta here, though. You’re too good for Willie’s crew.”
Ronnie smiled and put her hand on Henry’s arm.
“You’re a sweetheart. It’s good money, though. I can’t just quit.”
Henry shook his head, “Some things aint worth the money, Sugar. You stay at a place like this too long… no good for nobody. Truth be told, I’m surprised you been here this long. There’s somethin’ different about you, girl. You got a fire inside you. Don’t you let it go out, now.”
Ronnie smiled. Henry had a way of seeing and saying things that others didn’t.
“I’ll think about it.” She said.
“You do that. Just don’t think too long.”
-------------------------------
“Hey Esperanza”, a tall redheaded girl said as Ronnie entered the familiar dressing room. She was half dressed in a frilly purple outfit and busily applying makeup in one of several full length mirrors set up around the room.
“Hey Sasha.” She said as she dropped her bag in one of the lockers along one wall, “Is Willie around?”
“Nah, he’s out scoutin’ for new girls.” She said with a slight roll of her eyes. They both knew that was what he called it when he decided to skip out for the night and go barhopping.
Esperanza sighed as she took off her coat and stuck it in the locker as well. Under the coat she wore a light blue two piece-outfit that perfectly highlighted every curve of her body. She was glad, actually, that Willie was gone. She really didn’t want to have to explain to him where she’d been for two weeks. Not just yet.
“Who’s on right now?” she asked as she locked her things up.
“Eva’s just comin’ off her set. Simone and Chastity are out workin’ the crowd. I’m up next, but you can take it if you want. I can’t get my fuckin’ eyeliner to look right. I should really start doin’ it at home before I come in like you do.”
Ronnie laughed. Sasha was always picky about her face.
“You look gorgeous, Chica.” She said, “But I’ll head out if you want a few more minutes. If Willie comes in, tell him I’m back.”
“Pshh…” Sasha muttered as she dabbed at her eye with a cloth, “You’ll be lucky if he noticed you were gone. I swear he’s fuckin’ clueless.”
Esperanza headed out the door with a half-grin and walked down the short hall that lead to the backstage, where she peeked out through the side curtain and watched short, skinny Eva strutting to the last few chords of some Usher song. As she looked out at the smoky room and the girl half-heartedly twirling around the stage she suddenly felt her heartbeat speed up and the blood pounding in her ears.
That was new. She NEVER got stagefright.
She fought back the momentary panic and closed her eyes, taking a few deep breaths before she opened them again. As she did, she saw Eva heading towards her.
“Hey you…” Eva said as she brushed past her, fishing dollar bills out of her G-string and garter. She wasn't even pretending to be shy about her nudity.
“Tough night to make a comeback, Sweetheart. It’s a rough house. Go out there and work some of that magic you always do.”
Ronnie smiled, but said nothing. Inside her heart was beating like a drum line. She stepped out onto the stage and Mike, the DJ, Flashed a grin at her.
“Ok, ladies and gentlemen,” he said into his microphone as he punched buttons on the computer that controlled the sound system, “Let’s welcome back to the stage our own little bit of latina heat… Esperrrrranza!”
As the first beats of the music started to fill the room, Ronnie walked shakily up to the pole and put her hand on it. She looked out at the faces scattered around the room, each one staring at her. She felt the rising tide of panic begin to take hold in her stomach and she fought to move her body, but nothing happened. Her muscles had locked and she couldn’t bring herself to dance. She could barely force herself to keep breathing.
Around her the audience was beginning to murmur. After a few more seconds someone in the back shouted out, “Hey, honey, you gonna take it off or what?” to which the rest of the audience responded with a mocking chuckle.
Ronnie felt the hair on her arms standing on end despite the warmth of the room and she willed herself to dance, to move, to do anything. Clumsily she stepped forward and did a half twist, but her high heel caught on the wooden stage and she nearly tripped. There was another wave of chuckling from the audience.
It was right at that moment, as she tried to regain her balance that she heard Indigo’s voice. She hadn’t realized... the song they were playing was one of his.
That was all it took. Her mouth opened and a small whimper came out as tears began to roll down her face. She broke and ran, turning and heading back off stage as fast as she could in her stilleto heels as a chorus of boos and laughs followed her. Clumsily, she made her way down the hall, stopping halfway to tear the shoes off her feet and drop them haphazardly in the hallway. She threw open the dressing room door, tears staining her cheeks and ran to her locker, quickly unlocking it and grabbing her things.
“Holy shit…” Sasha said, turning to look at her distrought coworker. She was still standing aat the same mirror fussing with her eyeliner.
“Are you ok, sweety?” she asked, but by that time Ronnie was already on her way back out, and she didn’t pause to answer her.
She ran back down the hallway, around to the staff entrance and didn’t stop until she was standing outside, where she fell down against the wall and caught her breathe, her eyes still watering.
“That was quick.” A deep voice said from beside her. She looked up and saw Henry towering over her, arms folded. He reached down with one large, meaty hand and helped her to her feet.
“You done thinking about it yet?”
Esperanza nodded, wiping the tears from her face with her coat.
“Good.” He said, “Now get on outta here. I’ll tell Willie you moved on to bigger and better things.”
Ronnie managed a weak smile and leaned forward, putting her arms around the giant of a man.
“I’ll miss you, Henry.” She said with a sniffle.
He laughed, “Hell, girl, I’ll miss you too. You take care of yourself.”
She nodded and pulled away from him, draping her long coat around herself as she turned and left, headed towards the parking lot.
“I told you there was something different about you.” He said, nonchalantly as she walked away.
She turned back and smiled at him.
“You were right.” She said.
Standing by the door was a large black man with a bald head and a long, braided goatee. His arms were nearly as big around as Esperanza’s waist. He smiled when he saw her walking toward him, revealing a set of gleaming white teeth.
“Esperanza! I thought maybe you finally smartened up and quit this dive.” He said in a deep voice, “It’s good to see you again, Baby-doll.”
“It’s good to see you too, Henry”, Ronnie said with a genuine smile, “No such luck, though. I’ve just been… dealing with a few things.”
The bouncer grinned, “I hear that, girl. Aint a soul in this place aint dealing with something or another. I really hoped you’d finally gotten outta here, though. You’re too good for Willie’s crew.”
Ronnie smiled and put her hand on Henry’s arm.
“You’re a sweetheart. It’s good money, though. I can’t just quit.”
Henry shook his head, “Some things aint worth the money, Sugar. You stay at a place like this too long… no good for nobody. Truth be told, I’m surprised you been here this long. There’s somethin’ different about you, girl. You got a fire inside you. Don’t you let it go out, now.”
Ronnie smiled. Henry had a way of seeing and saying things that others didn’t.
“I’ll think about it.” She said.
“You do that. Just don’t think too long.”
-------------------------------
“Hey Esperanza”, a tall redheaded girl said as Ronnie entered the familiar dressing room. She was half dressed in a frilly purple outfit and busily applying makeup in one of several full length mirrors set up around the room.
“Hey Sasha.” She said as she dropped her bag in one of the lockers along one wall, “Is Willie around?”
“Nah, he’s out scoutin’ for new girls.” She said with a slight roll of her eyes. They both knew that was what he called it when he decided to skip out for the night and go barhopping.
Esperanza sighed as she took off her coat and stuck it in the locker as well. Under the coat she wore a light blue two piece-outfit that perfectly highlighted every curve of her body. She was glad, actually, that Willie was gone. She really didn’t want to have to explain to him where she’d been for two weeks. Not just yet.
“Who’s on right now?” she asked as she locked her things up.
“Eva’s just comin’ off her set. Simone and Chastity are out workin’ the crowd. I’m up next, but you can take it if you want. I can’t get my fuckin’ eyeliner to look right. I should really start doin’ it at home before I come in like you do.”
Ronnie laughed. Sasha was always picky about her face.
“You look gorgeous, Chica.” She said, “But I’ll head out if you want a few more minutes. If Willie comes in, tell him I’m back.”
“Pshh…” Sasha muttered as she dabbed at her eye with a cloth, “You’ll be lucky if he noticed you were gone. I swear he’s fuckin’ clueless.”
Esperanza headed out the door with a half-grin and walked down the short hall that lead to the backstage, where she peeked out through the side curtain and watched short, skinny Eva strutting to the last few chords of some Usher song. As she looked out at the smoky room and the girl half-heartedly twirling around the stage she suddenly felt her heartbeat speed up and the blood pounding in her ears.
That was new. She NEVER got stagefright.
She fought back the momentary panic and closed her eyes, taking a few deep breaths before she opened them again. As she did, she saw Eva heading towards her.
“Hey you…” Eva said as she brushed past her, fishing dollar bills out of her G-string and garter. She wasn't even pretending to be shy about her nudity.
“Tough night to make a comeback, Sweetheart. It’s a rough house. Go out there and work some of that magic you always do.”
Ronnie smiled, but said nothing. Inside her heart was beating like a drum line. She stepped out onto the stage and Mike, the DJ, Flashed a grin at her.
“Ok, ladies and gentlemen,” he said into his microphone as he punched buttons on the computer that controlled the sound system, “Let’s welcome back to the stage our own little bit of latina heat… Esperrrrranza!”
As the first beats of the music started to fill the room, Ronnie walked shakily up to the pole and put her hand on it. She looked out at the faces scattered around the room, each one staring at her. She felt the rising tide of panic begin to take hold in her stomach and she fought to move her body, but nothing happened. Her muscles had locked and she couldn’t bring herself to dance. She could barely force herself to keep breathing.
Around her the audience was beginning to murmur. After a few more seconds someone in the back shouted out, “Hey, honey, you gonna take it off or what?” to which the rest of the audience responded with a mocking chuckle.
Ronnie felt the hair on her arms standing on end despite the warmth of the room and she willed herself to dance, to move, to do anything. Clumsily she stepped forward and did a half twist, but her high heel caught on the wooden stage and she nearly tripped. There was another wave of chuckling from the audience.
It was right at that moment, as she tried to regain her balance that she heard Indigo’s voice. She hadn’t realized... the song they were playing was one of his.
That was all it took. Her mouth opened and a small whimper came out as tears began to roll down her face. She broke and ran, turning and heading back off stage as fast as she could in her stilleto heels as a chorus of boos and laughs followed her. Clumsily, she made her way down the hall, stopping halfway to tear the shoes off her feet and drop them haphazardly in the hallway. She threw open the dressing room door, tears staining her cheeks and ran to her locker, quickly unlocking it and grabbing her things.
“Holy shit…” Sasha said, turning to look at her distrought coworker. She was still standing aat the same mirror fussing with her eyeliner.
“Are you ok, sweety?” she asked, but by that time Ronnie was already on her way back out, and she didn’t pause to answer her.
She ran back down the hallway, around to the staff entrance and didn’t stop until she was standing outside, where she fell down against the wall and caught her breathe, her eyes still watering.
“That was quick.” A deep voice said from beside her. She looked up and saw Henry towering over her, arms folded. He reached down with one large, meaty hand and helped her to her feet.
“You done thinking about it yet?”
Esperanza nodded, wiping the tears from her face with her coat.
“Good.” He said, “Now get on outta here. I’ll tell Willie you moved on to bigger and better things.”
Ronnie managed a weak smile and leaned forward, putting her arms around the giant of a man.
“I’ll miss you, Henry.” She said with a sniffle.
He laughed, “Hell, girl, I’ll miss you too. You take care of yourself.”
She nodded and pulled away from him, draping her long coat around herself as she turned and left, headed towards the parking lot.
“I told you there was something different about you.” He said, nonchalantly as she walked away.
She turned back and smiled at him.
“You were right.” She said.
