Loose Ends

Esperanza knocked lightly on the door to Aimee and Connie's house while balancing a large, foil-covered tray in her other hand. She wore a simple light sundress and her hair was blowing freely in the warm summer wind.

She was counting on Connie being out of the house at the moment. She needed to talk to Aimee. And she needed to do it soon.

"Hold on a sec, Ronnie," Aimee called down, pulling on a pair of jeans as she hopped down the stairs.

Skidding to halt at the front door, she opened the door with a curious look on her face.

"Come on in, soleil. What's up?"

Ronnie smiled somewhat awkwardly. It was good to see Aimee again, but it had been two weeks since she'd seen her, and their last discussion had ended... badly.

"I uh... I come bearing gifts." Ronnie said as she stepped inside, carefully slipping off her sandals and setting them aside.

"I made you guys a tray of tamales. I know you like them. Also there's some stuffed peppers for Connie."

Aimee's face lit up as she took the tray, stepping aside to let Ronnie in.

"Mmm, gracias. I was kind of getting hungry anyway. You're a life-saver."

Closing the door, Aimee led Ronnie into the kitchen and gestured for her to take a seat. She stopped at the cabinet to grab a plate, turning to Ronnie."

"You hungry too, or just dining for one right now?"

Ronnie smiled and sat down at the table.

"Oh, no thank you. I just ate a little while ago."

It was a lie, but a small one, and only because she didn't want to worry her friend. Ronnie hadn't eaten since breakfast and even that had been just a handful of fruit. Her appetite simply wasn't what it used to be.

"Look, Aimee..." she started as Aimee prepared her plate, "I wanted to tell you that I'm sorry. I'm sorry for what I said that night at Halo. You were right. I wasn't myself."

"You don't have to apologize for that, Ronnie. We've been going through a lot, you especially." Aimee sat, unwrapping the tamales onto her plate.

"I was just concerned. You're usually so assured, it was odd seeing you act differently. But, you know, we all change." She stopped eating, frowning.

"I just worry its too easy for this to change us in ways we might not want."

Ronnie sighed and rested her chin in her hand.

"Yeah." she said, "I see what you mean. This whole thing... it's been rough for all of us the last few months. We're all different people than we were before. I don't know what I am, much less what I'm becoming. But I know that I was on the wrong path that night, and you made me realize it before it was too late. Thank you for that."

Aimee looked up, a half-smile and a quizzical look on her face.

"Not that I disagree on us being different people, but, Ronnie, why do you think I talked to you that night? I wasn't trying to stop you from having fun. I just wanted to make sure you realized what it was. You weren't thinking, and that's very dangerous for us now. Believe me, I know."

Ronnie smiled back and reached over, putting her hand on Aimee's arm.

"I know that now. I just wanted to thank you for looking out for me. I was doing things for all the wrong reasons."

"I've been doing a lot of thinking lately. It's kind of all I've been doing, really. About what's important to me. I just want you to know that you're one of my best friends and I love and respect you. Thanks for being there for me when I needed you."

"I'd hug you right now, chica, but I think it'd make a mess. Suffice to say, thank you, and I love and respect you too."

Aimee let the statement hang for a moment before changing the subject.

"So, I've been thinking too, and I've been wanting to talk to you. I think we need to figure out what we're doing. Like, goals and such. Long-term. Its not really my strong suit, but Connie is...distant, lately; Nils is occupied, Simon seems like he's in another world half the time, and Bea and Chad take things as they come. I thought if anyone would understand looking at the bigger picture, it would be you."

Ronnie sighed and leaned back in her chair.

"Yeah, it would be nice to have an idea of what we're working towards. So far everything's been coming at us so fast we haven't been able to do anything but react. It's not gonna do us any good to run around putting out fires while the whole world is going up in flames."

She shrugged.

"Maybe we should be looking for a way to get back in touch with our parents. I think we need more information than what they've seen fit to give us."

"Is that necessarily who we should be asking? They haven't been terribly forthcoming so far. Still, information, even skewed information, might help." Aimee sighed, frustrated. "I had a related thought, though. Remember the guy who gave me the guitar? He said he was on Hurricane or somesuch's side. Do our parents have people like that? I don't mean like neo-pagans, Asatru, that sort of thing. Those are people who believe our parents exist. I mean, are there, and I hate using this term, but mortals who know our parents exist? Eitri is great support, but I can't help but feel there should be more out there?"

"I don't know..." Ronnie said, "I never really thought of that. Even if they are out there, though, how do we find them? We can't exactly take out a classified ad."

"I'm not sure. That's the problem. Maybe its more a Simon-type thing. He's good at finding people. I'm just saying its a resource we haven't accessed yet, but which, in theory, should be out there."

Aimee leaned back, becoming more animated as she spoke.

"I mean, when you think about it, our parents really didn't prepare us terribly well for this. They showed up, literally handed several of us weapons, and told us to fight the good fight. Its...sloppy, which is becoming increasingly troubling to me. I'm wondering if we should be on their side at all."

Ronnie folded her arms and was thoughtfully silent for a moment.

"Why does it have to be about sides?" she asked eventually, "As far as I'm concerned our parents gave us tools. What we use them for is up to us. I don't want to fight a war. I just want to help people. If our parents can give us the power to do that then I'd count them as allies."

"That's exactly what I'm saying. As far as I'm concerned, I'm grateful to them, but my first loyalty is to us, and to humanity in general. Mom and Dad can fight Oma and Pop-Pop till, well, Ragnarok, for all I care, as long as the world is safe. That's the goal that concerns me. The problem is ensuring it."

Ronnie shrugged.

"Yeah, I can agree with that." she said with a sigh.

"I just... I don't know if I'm cut out for this. I mean when Chrys died... I didn't think that things could get much worse. Then after Indigo... I don't know if I can stand seeing anyone else hurt. Not to mention what it's doing to us individually. Between Nils' drinking and Bea's anger, I don't know which is worse. Or how to help."

"I'll be honest, Ronnie, I'm scared what its doing to me. But, realistically, how can we not be ready? We were, on a literal level, born for this."

Aimee looked down at her plate of half eaten food and frowned. She placed her fork on the table and continued.

"I...I just don't know. This is coming easier and easier to me, and that scares the crap out of me. At the same time, Simon and Connie are pulling away, Nils is going to drink himself into an early grave, Bea's going to put more people into one, and I'm not even sure that last one's a bad thing. Ronnie, what the hell are we becoming?"

"I don't know, chica..." Esperanza said quietly.

She gave a short sarcastic laugh.

"Those who would fight monsters...."